Looking Up

Yep, that's my house down there. The new mulch looks really great doesn't it?

Well, it's been an interesting month on the booze front. Now, it's not like I was struggling with the sauce, at least from a worldly perspective. Over the past few years, I have rarely consumed. Maybe a little wine with breakfast, I mean dinner. (Wow, I don't need booze to be funny)

So, when I felt called by God (maybe for the umpteenth time, but still patiently and with love) to give up drinking, it wasn't as if I was tearing myself away from raging parties. That's not to say I haven't had some temptations.

Still, it has created a few interesting situations. I've had to directly turn down drinks once in my own home. I've been in a few other settings (a party, a ballgame) where I normally would have a few.

And while I've resisted any temptation, I've noticed that I often look around me rather than up to my Father to get permission.

Oh, he's having a drink, and he's a Christian guy. I should be able to also.

It's not just with drinking...other things I've felt challenged to give up like inappropriate movies and music.

An example of this is the show 24. When I learned about viewing violence as a doorway for the enemy, I immediately thought of this show. I felt compelled to not watch it this season. I noticed that it seemed to be food for spirits of anger and fear.

Well...

I watched it.

Made some excuses and started watching, and then I had to finish it right? Right?

Wrong...I gave it up and missed the last 2 hours. That's the equivalent of leaving a movie before the last 20 minutes. I'll confess I did read a recap afterward, but I didn't watch it.

I'm glad I listened, because my life is still going having not seen the end. I saw a few less fictitious people die.

The thing is, I saw that some people I considered good people made comments about 24 on Facebook or Twitter.

Well, if these good people are watching 24, if they're having a brew at a BBQ, then that means it's OK for me too right?

Wrong again. This is not about them. It's about me. I have my own personal battle I'm waging, regardless of what others are doing. And this is not to condemn them. It's simply to highlight I need to stop looking around me, because I'll always find a "good person" that allows me to justify a bad choice for ME.

While we have a common enemy, the game plan being used against us is unique. It's all the same stuff, just sliced, diced and thrust at us in a personalized way. The ultimate marketing ploy.

Not only does that trip us up, it discredits the fact that the Lord made us unique (Jer 1:5). I share some commonalities with my brothers and sisters, but if the Lord calls something out in me, I need to know it is a unique piece of advice, a light on my personal path. It's good to have it.

bc

Fear has a mustache

Heading into our class, I knew Fear was a biggie with me, maybe the biggest.

But what guy wants to admit that his biggest struggle is fear. Can't I struggle with something more "manly" than that?

Alas, aside from the general shame we feel with all these strongholds, I realized there is something else about Fear...Fear is a real bully in my life...a bully that feels like it's only threatens me when no one else is looking. (The Ben Stiller character in Happy Gilmore came to mind, hence the picture).

During this process, a fear I've felt is that I will have an actual, physical face-to-face with a spirit. That intimidates me.

You see, I've had a couple previous encounters with demons. They were a few years ago, but I've had more heightened senses ever since. Actually, I guess I've always had heightened senses, I just didn't realize it until recently.

But now I'm starting to see the enemies' playbook. Strike, threaten and intimidate. We won't come out and scare you, but we're here and we're watching you. Not fun, and certainly not freedom.

Well, it's time to go on the offense. God is leading me more and more, helping me feel His presence during these times. It's truly Psalm 23 stuff. I'm just hanging back and letting him use his staff as I get my legs about me. So not only do I have Authority over these buggers, I've got the ultimate bodyguard! Now that is a great feeling, a freeing feeling.

It's definitely time to root some things out, some major things. And if I see 'em, I see 'em.

Oh Yeah!!

This is the feeling I'm going for.

I was there to watch a brother find it last night.

It was quite sweet to be sure.

Close Encounter

I was driving to class at UC this morning, and a man called to me in my car at a stoplight. He was likely in his 40's. It was an interesting exchange to say the least.

Man: Excuse me (or something along those lines to get my attention)

BC: Yes (while rolling down passenger side window)

Man: Could you give me some money? I'm hungry. I need $4 to fill me up.

BC: (overcoming initial pangs of wanting to hold onto "my money", I reached into my wallet and pulled out a $5.) Here you go, this should fill you up even more right. (I did not get the joy/amusement I was expecting from this statement. I followed this up with a simple blessing). God Bless You.

Man: Um, I lied to you. I just wanted the money for crack. Do you want it back? (he said this with real humility. It definitely caught me by surprise. I felt compelled to reach back for the money, because I didn't want to help him with this purchase. Also, I confess I was a little perturbed about being "scammed" if you will.)

Man: (Now in a somewhat jovial voice as he pulled his hand back with the $5 still in his hand) I was just kidding about that crack thing...I'm actually suicidal.

At this point, the light had been green for I'm not sure how long, and traffic was starting to pull up from earlier lights. A car almost hit him. It wasn't that close, but the irony of this many saying he was suicidal and then a car blaring it's horn at him 2 seconds later was not lost on me.

The exchange was maybe a total of 30 seconds...no more than a minute. The way this man seemed to come "in and out of it" really struck me. There was definitely an oppressive spiritual force at work. The lying, the addiction, the suicidal thoughts. This man is dealing with some serious demons.

Saying "God Bless You" seemed to cut through this, if only for an instant.

...my worldly impulse is be mad at losing/wasting $5.

...my heart is thankful that the Lord let me see this humble man, to speak blessings to him and to witness another tangible example of how the enemy stalks his prey - and what I can do to combat.

I'm praying that man fills up on neither food nor drug...but rather on the love of Jesus.

I'm still chewing on this...maybe more to come on my new brother in Clifton. I'm hoping I see him again.

b